Growing up in a family that could teach the Lindsey Lohans of the world a thing or two about drama, I learned a valuable lesson: Trust Yourself First. Crazy people are so wrapped up in their own internal chaos that they, despite any declarations of eternal friendship or undying loyalty, do not have the capacity to adequately care for themselves, let alone you. You will get thrown under the bus every time.
The question then becomes, HOW do you know if someone/something/some place is safe or not? The answer is simple: Trust Yourself First. (No, not the little voice that says it’s ok to eat chocolate chip cookies for breakfast!) Trust your gut. Listen to that small inner voice that is shouting,”Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!”
In the interests of finding something good out of everything we experience, let me give you an example from my life. I wish I could say this is my only example, but unfortunately, I have plenty more from which to choose. Yes, I am a slow learner. 🙂
Forced to make a mid-life career change, I was anxious about finding a new job in my new chosen career as everyone in the industry told me how difficult it was to get a start. After the offer, everyone then advised/urged/lectured me to take the offer despite my misgivings about the firm. As I told my son at the time, “I smell chaos.” What followed is the stuff of which movies like “The Devil Wears Prada” are based. Yes, I finally got the training I desperately needed to succeed in my new field but it came at a HUGE cost. The worst part is that I knew from the start and I let others opinions matter more than the one that really mattered- my own. Yes, it all worked out in the end, but I could have saved myself a heck of a lot of angst if I had simply listened to what I KNEW to be true.
Lesson: Trust Yourself First. Only YOU know what is best for YOU.